


Drowning In the Flames

by Fanficsat2AM



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Before you kill me, Character Death, Crying, Dad isnt a dad anymore, Death, Grief/Mourning, Happy Ending, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm sorry Patton stans, Is it possible to prepare you for this???, It's like reeeaallly sad, Like seriously there is nothing happy abt this except flashbacks, Morality | Patton Sanders Angst, Morality | Patton Sanders-centric, My last warning, Patton Angst, Patton angst lovers come get y'all juice, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic DRLAMP - Freeform, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Platonic Relationships, Please Don't Kill Me, Read end notes, This Is Sad, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Why Did I Write This?, be prepared to cry, major angst, no ships, this hurts my soul
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:15:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26694346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanficsat2AM/pseuds/Fanficsat2AM
Summary: Patton and his roommates had been having such a great day, but when Patton returns to their apartment building after a long walk to find it in flames, he falls to his knees when he realizes one key element:His friends are still inside.
Comments: 13
Kudos: 40





	1. Bubbles

**Author's Note:**

> GET Y'ALLS TISSUES READY, CAUSE IT'S TIME TO CRY

Patton sat on the ground, legs tucked beneath him. He stared at the ground. The building currently on fire in front of him blazed, hot as ever. So, so hot.

Hot enough to burn someone to death.

Tears slid down his cheeks. He felt numb. He knew the situation, he knew exactly what was happening. How the fire had started, he had no idea, but it seemed like such a small detail lost in the sea of emptiness that was his heart. He knew he was sad- no, that was not a strong enough adjective. Devastated was better, but it didn’t come close. Still, he couldn’t think of anything else.

So he was devastated.

He knew he was- if he concentrated enough, he could feel the feeling. It was pushing. Pushing on the walls of the bubble he felt like he was in. A bubble of emptiness, numbness. The emotions were pressing on the sides, fighting to get in and get to him. Patton wasn’t sure what he wanted more- the emotions or the numbness. He settled on the numbness, but the inevitability would crush him soon. Oh well.

More tears continued to fall down his cheeks, he focused on those. It was easier to focus on this than the problem at hand. 

Bringing his finger to his face, he swiped one off and stared the wet skin. He wondered if he cried enough, shed enough tears, then maybe would it put out the fire? He only wished it would; he only wished there had been tears to put out the flames before they had spread. 

How could a day so ordinary turn out so terribly?

No one had work that day, so the apartment’s six residents had decided to have a movie marathon. Logan, Roman, Patton, Virgil, Janus, and Remus had set up camp in the living room with tons of blankets, stuffed animals, and pillows. They had even built a fort! 

After watching plenty of Disney movies, they ordered pizza for lunch. Then they had played board games (including several VERY heated matches of Uno) until Remus wouldn’t stop eating the game pieces so they switched back to movies. 

Eventually, they thought it would be fun to watch a horror movie Remus and Virgil had been wanting to see. Patton wasn’t quite the horror movie fan, so he decided that he would go on a walk while they watched the film. He needed some exercise and fresh air anyway, he had been laying around in the apartment all day. So he went on a walk to the dog park.

Then he got back. 

Patton gave them plenty of time, about two hours because they’d said it would be a long movie. Plus, he always took a  _ long _ time at the dog park.

Oh, how he wished he had come home early.

Because when he did get home, the apartment building was engulfed in flames. At first he had panicked, calling his roommates’ phones (none of them picked up) and tried opening the front doors. He didn’t get far, the smoke was too thick and the flames went right up to the entrance. So he’d stepped back after calling 911, fear wrapping its cold fingers around his heart.

He fell to his knees. 

Patton didn’t know when he had started crying or when the numbness had formed its shield around him, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. All he cared about were his friends, his  _ family _ in the burning building. The only people who had ever accepted him for being pansexual after his parents kicked him out. The people who he had found when he was looking for places to stay and had cried out in relief when the ad listing said “Queer friendly”. The people he’d gone to pride parades with. The people who had helped him whenever his disapproving mother or angry father called, or the one time they had visited _. _

The people he’d lived with

Smiled with

Laughed with

Cuddled with

Cried with

Loved.

Maybe it was remembering that fact, or the arriving first-responders that popped his bubble. The sharp stab of pain pierced through the comforting walls and his heart. It hurt just as much as, if not more than, someone stabbing him with a red-hot knife. 

Patton leaned over, clutching his stomach and beginning to sob. They were ugly and choked, the cries. The sadness was overwhelming, taking over his every thought. He cried loudly, not caring who heard. All he could think was that they were gone.

_ They were gone. _

Patton screamed. The pain of the loss was too much- he wanted it gone. No, he knew exactly what he wanted.

He wanted his family back.

But the sad part of reality is that you can’t always have what you want.

Patton yelled again, nothing in particular. Just a cry of pain, tears streaming down his face. The yell petered out, turning once again into devastated weeping. He vaguely felt something touch his shoulder and he shot up. 

“GET AWAY FROM ME!” Patton screamed, swatting away the hand that was on him and prying open his eyes to see who it was. A fireman.  _ Not Logan, not Roman, not Virgil, not Janus, not Remu- _

He bent his neck again, covering his wet face with his hands. The anger or... whatever that was, was gone instantly. Suddenly he was weak, too weak. Strong enough to stay sitting, but not enough to fight the hands that gently pulled him to his feet. They led him to what he guessed, in the back of his mind, was a car. He opened his eyes to see that it was, indeed, a car. He turned his eyes to see a person with curly hair, a police uniform, and a sympathetic look in their eyes. 

“Hey there, I’m Quil, I’m gonna need you to get in the car for me.”

It took him a moment, but Patton comprehended the words and his lips parted. “But-but my friends, they-“ his voice suddenly stopped working, shattering sadness making him break down once more.

“It’s okay, I get it. We’re sending some of our people in to take care of the fire. I recommend coming with me to the fire station, I have some questions to ask you,” the police officer, Quil, said in a soothing voice. However, it did nothing to calm the screaming pain coursing through his body. 

He nodded, wiping one of his cheeks, and climbed in the police cruiser silently. Once he was buckled, he slumped over and leaned his head on the seat, facing the window. He squeezed his eyes shut, face contorting like he’d just eaten a lemon. Somehow tears were still pouring from his eyes. 

Patton hated this.

He hated the constant reminder he got every second that they were gone, that he was never going to see them again. At some point along the ride, he tried to think of something else, to distract himself. He had even taken out his phone and looked on social media, but to no such luck. No matter how hard he tried, Patton couldn’t stop thinking of his friends. He couldn’t escape the sadness, the never ending despair. It was sucking him in like a black hole. Grief was the force tugging him into the darkness, swallowing him whole, and he couldn’t do anything about it. 

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, they reached the police station. Patton was so consumed by grief that he didn’t realize it until Quil was unbuckling him (he couldn’t do it himself, they had special buckles) and stepping back so he could get out. 

Patton took a deep breath and stepped out, leaning against the car once he did. He didn’t want to be standing, he wanted to curl up in a ball and disappear. Disappear so he didn’t have to feel the ever-present sadness that sucked out his energy and focus with a straw of pain. 

“Come on.”

The man squeezed his eyes closed shut tightly one last time before following Quil into the station. He wrapped his arms around his stomach, trying to make the yearning ache there go away. It remained.

  
Quil led him through the station to the front desk. After exchanging a few words with the receptionist, they led him through a hallway, past a few large rooms full of desks and bustling with activity, and to a small room with a single white desk, three chairs, and a mirror across one wall. Patton had seen enough movies and TV shows to know that it was transparent from the other side and there were probably people on the other side. Shows he had watched with his roommates…

  
Another sob racked his body and Quil put their hand on his shoulder. 

“Okay, I’ll be right back. You just sit in that chair right there, ‘kay?” they instructed. Patton nodded and sat at the single chair facing the mirror and the two chairs on the other side. He brought his knees to his chest and rested his chin on his knees. 

God, he missed them already.

He could still sharply remember details from earlier that morning:

Roman acting out different Disney Prince scenes

Remus acting out different Disney Villain scenes

Logan being so proud of himself when he won Monopoly

Virgil unexpectedly crying during Inside Out

Janus trying to get his hat back when everyone stole it and was passing it around

For what seemed like the thousandth time that evening, Patton found himself crying. He squeezed his legs closer to his chest and buried his face into them, sobbing. Not so loudly, however, that he didn’t hear the door open.

  
He looked up, wiping his cheeks, as Quil came back in with a clipboard. It had several papers and a pen clipped onto it.

“Hey bud. I have to ask you some basic questions, you okay with that? They’re just questions like name and phone number.”

Patton looked down at his lap as he unfolded his legs so he sat normally in his chair. “Yeah,” he said, voice breaking. Quil gave him a smile before sitting down and looking at their clipboard. 

“Okay, what’s your name?”

“Patton Seymour.”

“Age?”

“Thirty-one.”

“Phone number and email?”

Patton gave Quil all the information about him that they needed. Then, they set the clipboard down and leaned forward, looking him right in the eye.

“So Patton, do you know what happened? Can you explain your entire perspective starting from this morning?”

Patton nodded.

“So me and my roommates…” his eyes teared up as he paused. Thinking about them sent a sharp stab of pain through his body. He started again with his shaky voice. “Me and my roommates all had the day off from work, which doesn’t happen often, so we just decided to hang out together. We watched movies and played board games, ordering pizza at around noon.” Patton noticed Quil write something down there, but he ignored it and went on, taking a deep breath. 

“Everyone wanted to watch a horror movie that one of them suggested, but I get really scared of scary movies and I don’t like them. Since I’d been inside all day, I decided to go on a walk to the dog park while they did. Time flies by very fast for me at the dog park. 

“Anyhow, it gets close to when they said they’d be done so I head back. Then…” Patton had to stop again. Quil offered one of their comforting smiles that seemed to be becoming common. “Then I came back and… and the-the building is in flames. I tried going in to get them, but there was too much smoke and flame. I also tried calling them but none of them picked up, then I called 911. After that I kind of just… fell to the ground because… they were…” Patton couldn’t go on, covering his mouth to muffle the choked sobs that escaped him. 

Quil smiled at him. “That’s all I need.” They smiled at him before standing up. 

“Well, I think you should stay here, you can’t exactly go back.” They studied him for a moment before sitting back down and taking Patton’s hand. “Don’t give up hope, they could have made it. You don’t know they’re gone.” Patton nodded, looking down as a flicker of hope made itself known in his chest.  _ Maybe _ . “What are your roommates’ names?”

Patton gave Quil their names and then went to the lobby, per their instructions. He really wanted them to be alive, god. He clung onto the sliver of hope he had like a lifeline.  _ Please, please, please _ . He pressed his hands together, murmuring a prayer before curling into a ball on the comfy chair he sat in. There was a table next to him with a stack of magazines, but he knew he could never distract himself from the issue at hand.

All he could do was wait.

It felt like an eternity. He played with the small collection of colorful bracelets he had on his wrist, bounced his knee in a way that would be very annoying if anyone had been near him- even bit his nails, a habit he’d seen Virgil practice a lot.   
  
Then Quil came out.

He leapt to his feet; it’d been only fifteen minutes, but Patton thought it had been much longer. Nevermind that, he stared at Quil. They stood in front of the hallway, looking at him with what he really hoped he was imagining was a sad expression. He looked at them expectantly as they walked over to him, looking at the ground now.

“So? Is there news?” Patton asked, nerves jumping. They were alive, they had to be!

Quil turned their gaze back up to him.

“I’m sorry Patton.”

His heart dropped.

He stayed silent.

The police officer took a deep breath.

“A lot of people escaped the building.

However, I’m very sorry to inform you… there were no survivors by the name of Virgil, Logan, Roman, Janus, or Remus among them.”

Patton’s world crashed down on him.

_ They.... _

If the first time he thought they were gone was bad, then this was so, so, so much worse.

He stood, all their voices echoing in his brain. Most of all, their laughs. They were all so sweet in their own way. If there was one thing he didn’t want to let go of, it was their laughs. Roman’s were usually loud and proud, as if he were showing the whole world,  _ hey, I find this funny!  _ Remus’ were also loud and proud, but they also kind of sounded like a very strong snicker. Logan didn’t laugh often, it was usually chuckles, but when he did, it was sort of soft and sweet. Virgil also didn’t outright laugh a lot, but when he did, it was really high pitched in a cute way- and sometimes, he even snorted! Janus’ were sharp and smooth, usually fond.

It was these memories, the laughter from different times, that was the thought at the front of his brain. He stood there, the numbness bubble returning. It felt surreal, like it was just a test and the group would come from the corridor with those amazing laughs of theirs. 

But it wasn’t.

So he just stood.

At some point he knew Quil had set their hands on his shoulders, but he heard only muffled speaking. All his senses were being blocked, all he felt was the numbness. 

Soon, though, he found there was a hole in his bubble from last time, and the emotions were seeping in. They started to fill the bubble, the liquidy feelings submerging his feet. Then his knees. Then his waist. Soon they were at his shoulders, weighing him down. There wasn’t a lot of air left, he was gasping. Finally the bubble was full of the emotions, crushing him. He was underwater, drowning in grief. If he was crying, the tears mixed in with the water that was filling his lungs. Devastation was all that he breathed, all he thought. The overwhelming sadness was too much.

Patton had a thought. He wasn’t sure if it was selfish or not. At this point, he wasn’t sure it mattered. What else was there to live for? No, he wasn’t going to kill himself. Not when he was the only one left, he had to keep going on behalf of all of them.

However, he still found himself wishing...

_ I wish I’d been in that burning apartment with them. _


	2. Gentle Hugs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You asked, I provided: here is the happy, real, ending to the story. Enjoy :)

It was somewhat silent.

Patton laid on the bed of a jail cell, too tired to do anything else. After he’d received the confirmation about his friends, he’d cried and sobbed and screamed for what felt like forever. Quil did what they could to console him, but to no avail. Finally, they took him to one of the empty jail cells they had and let him lay on the bed. 

It was so lonely. He missed his friends- okay, that was an understatement. He missed them more than anything in the world, more than any _ one _ . He’d felt his phone in his pocket ring and buzz, but he always ignored it. All he could think was that  _ they were gone, gone, gone…. _

What would happen now? Surely there would be funerals for them, but Patton couldn’t bear the thought of going to see his best friends, his  _ family _ laying silently in caskets. Oh, they would be burned. He would have to look at their charred bodies- or maybe they would keep the casket closed, then people wouldn’t have to see the remains of what their friends and family used to be. He choked out another sob. Their families, what would happen to them? They’d surely be there. What would they say? If he did end up going, could he bear it? All those people coming up to him and asking about their dead sons or brothers. He’d have to stare at their faces, seeing how they were related- seeing how it hurt so much to see someone that looked even a  _ little _ like them. He could never do it.

Patton didn’t know when, or how long it took, but at some point, he drifted off to sleep.

He woke up, forgetting the previous day’s events, and wondered why he was in a jail cell.

  
Then it hit him.

It was like a slap to the face, the memories. He cried once more, feeling the loss of his friends more than ever. It was different now, more of a reality. It was like his heart had broken in five, and each man had stolen a piece and clutched it in their hands, letting it burn along with him in that terrible fire.

Finally, he managed to calm down enough to look and spot a sticky note on the cell door. He shakily stood up and walked over, taking it off the metal and reading it:

_ Patton, _

_ When you wake up, come to my desk. It’s in the big room closest to the main lobby, it has a bunch of other desks in it. I’ll be working, but just come right up to me _

_ -Officer Quil _

Patton swallowed and stuffed the note in his pocket. Then, making sure he had his phone, he opened the gate and walked down the hallway. As he did, he ran a hand through his hair, trying to make himself look at least a little presentable, all the while trying to distract himself from the thought of his friends.

He eventually found the room- it was full of desks, like Quil wrote, and some other doors and plants were placed around the room. Barely any people were there, but it only took Patton a quick scan of the room to spot Quil. They were writing something down before turning towards their computer and typing on it.

“Quil?” he said, flinching at how hoarse and cracked his voice was from crying. They looked up at him, smiling as they did. “Hey, Patton. How are you feeling?” Patton looked at the ground. “Not good, huh? Can’t blame you after last night. But hey, I got the best news this morning, and it will fix everything, yeah?” He looked back up at them, screwing his eyebrows together. What could  _ possibly _ make him feel better after his best friends’  _ deaths _ ? He gulped, pushing away the thought before it became too much.

“Trust me, it will. But instead of telling you, I’ll take you there. Not to the apartment, don’t worry,” they said hurriedly once they saw sadness and fear flash across his face. “No, it’s a surprise. Let me get you something from the kitchen, because I’ll bet you’re starving, and you can eat on the way there. ‘Kay?” Patton nodded, wrapping his hands around his stomach that he just realize was, indeed, empty.

Quil finished whatever they were doing quickly, grabbed him a bagel from the kitchen, and they both got in their police cruiser before driving off. While Patton’s stomach was empty, he still didn’t have much of an appetite, so he only managed a few bites. Could you blame him? His friends just died in a fire, all five at once- he didn’t even get to say goodbye!

Patton flinched again, rubbing the back of his hand across his face to get rid of the tears that had begun to fall.

“So once the fire was put out, the team discovered that the fire was started because an air-conditioner unit exploded and it started a chain reaction, lighting the building on fire.” Patton strove and succeeded at not crying, but still couldn’t ignore the ache that settled in his stomach.

Upon noticing this, Quil filled the drive with stories about other cases they’d had. Patton put all his attention on what they were saying, doing his best to distract himself. What were they talking about? A… bear? Patton trained his focus on Quil’s voice instead- it was easier.

Finally, they arrived wherever Quil had taken them. Patton looked up from where he had been staring at his folded hands in his lap, ignoring the pang in his chest that he got when he remembered that he’d adopted that habit from Logan.

“Okay, we are here. C’mon out.” Patton peered through the windshield up at the tall building. His stomach churned when he read the word “HOSPITAL” in big letters on the front. Why were they here? Did Quil come to torment him by showing him their bodies? Patton felt himself getting dizzy and pale, his bagel wanting to resurface; God, the charred bodies of his friends-

“-ey, Pat, can ya hear me?” Patton blinked and looked up at Quil standing with the car door open. “You good? Looking a little pale there.” Patton nodded and tried to push his breakfast down, not letting himself throw up now. He stood up and followed Quil into the hospital.

They stepped into the hospital and boy, it was busy. Other burn victims, Patton guessed. “Okay, wait here,” Quil said as they led him to one of the chairs in the waiting area. “I’ll be back.” He then watched as Quil went up to the front receptionist, talked to them for a moment, then came back. “Okay, they’ll only be a few minutes.” 

A few minutes, they were. Patton passed these hundreds of seconds by mindlessly looking at the magazines stacked on the table. Nothing much- they didn’t have the kind of magazines he liked, only ones about famous people.

At last, however, a doctor came out and waved them over. Quil and Patton did just that. “Hello, I’m Doctor Joan, they/them pronouns. They’re right this way,” the doctor said, smiling. The two followed Joan through busy, bland halls. Meanwhile, Patton’s mind was racing.  _ They? They?! I can’t see their bodies, not now, probably not ever! And I was told this surprise was going to be good- Jesus Christ I might throw up. _

Luckily, Patton managed to keep his bagel in as they walked down the corridors. There were many doctors rushing past them, probably because a lot of people got killed or injured in the fire. 

At last, Joan stopped in front of a door. “It was actually a little funny- they wouldn’t go with the first-responders unless they were put in a room together. Well, I say they as in they all asked of this- it was mostly just two of them, brothers if I recall correctly,” Patton furrowed his brows. . _ They asked for something? What is Joan talking about…? _ With all that’s been happening, he just pushed it aside- he didn’t have the brain power to figure it out.

_ Still, they said it as if the group were still alive… _

Patton didn’t notice Quil observing him with a smile as the three entered. At first, Patton didn’t see anything, just a bunch of curtains. He scanned the room, confused.

But then he saw him.

At first it was just an empty bed, but then he realized there was a lump in it. And that lump was Roman. 

_ No… _ .

Tears pricked his eyes, then began to overflow. Hearing the news was one thing, but seeing his dead friend… he couldn’t take it and began to cry. Yeah, it was weird how his body wasn’t burnt to a crisp, but he was still dead and a little burnt in places. Bandages and scratches covered the face Roman had constantly bragged about, and his eyes, which were usually so bright and happy, were closed.

Patton sobbed, ignoring the confused look that Joan and Quil shared. He walked over to the bed and sat on the stool next to it, laying his forehead onto Roman’s stomach and taking the once-lively man’s warm hand. He sobbed and cried, until suddenly a thought popped up.

_ Wait, warm hand? _

“Padre?”

Patton shot up, gasping as he turned his head to look at the man’s face. 

His eyes were open

_ And he was smiling. _

“R…. Roman?” Patton whispered, eyes widening. His free hand came up to cover his mouth. “Yep, that’s me. Why are you cryi-” Suddenly, Roman was attacked by Patton with one of his famous hugs. But this one was different, in some way- it was tighter, and (somehow) filled with more love than any other hug he’d received.

“Sir I’ll need you to be a bit more gentle, he has fresh burns!” Joan exclaimed, coming over and peeling a sobbing Patton off of Roman, who was now clenching his teeth in pain. “Indeed; I appreciate the sentiment, but it does hurt quite a bit.” What Roman didn’t expect even more, however, was the constant, loud (but luckily muffled) wailing of Patton, who was crying into his hands. 

“I’m sorry Roman, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you, I just- I- you’re-” he couldn’t speak, making undecipherable hand gestures until grabbing Roman’s wrist and squeezing it tightly. His wrist, because his hands were wrapped in bandages.

“Pat, you okay? I mean, you’re crying and you’re doing… whatever the heck this is,” Roman said in his confusion. “I thought you were dead, Roman!” Patton cried, eyes finally meeting Roman’s. The princely man’s eyes widened, then he muttered a small “oh,” before opening his arms a bit. “A light hug.”

Patton immediately seized the opportunity, taking care to be gentle but also pouring so, so much love into the embrace. “I thought you were dead,” he murmured again into Roman’s chest, tears leaking onto his shirt and wetting it. “I know, I know,” the other replied, weaving a hand through his friend’s hair. “How did you get out?” “That’s a story for later.” Then a thought came to Patton.

“Wait, the others… are they gone or…. Are they-” “Yes,” Roman cut off. “They are alive.” Patton let out a happy laugh in disbelief. “I’m pretty sure anyway, some of us are pretty wrecked up. Luckily I only got a few burns on my hands, torso, and feet,” he said, looking away. 

“Well where are they?” Patton asked frantically, standing up and looking around but not letting go of Roman’s wrist. Then he remembered- 

“Oh, in this room. Me and Remus fought pretty hard to make sure we were together. Yeah, they’re behind the other curtains.” Patton looked from Roman, to Quil and Joan, to the curtain that was to his friend’s left, and then back to Roman again, inspecting him to see what injuries he had.

However, Roman knew Patton well, and exactly what he was thinking.

“Patton.” Said man looked up. “Go see them. I’ll be fine.”

“You sure?”

“While I absolutely love the attention, Pat, I think that in order to keep you sane, you must go see them.”

Patton smiled at Roman gratefully before giving his wrist one last squeeze and walking away. He stepped around the curtain and gasped.

His son.

Most of his roommates were Patton's sons, in his mind, but one of them he was especially protective of.

“Hey Dad, I thought I heard squealing,” his gravelly voice said, even more hoarse than usual.

Patton immediately rushed over to Virgil, engulfing him in the same light but loving hug he gave Roman. He definitely did not miss how tight Virgil wrapped his arms around him as he hugged back. “Oh, Virgil, you sweet and misunderstood shadowling,” Patton said, releasing some of the tears he had held back upon seeing the emo. While he grumbled something about “not being that much younger than anyone else in the group,” with an annoyed tone, the Dad figure knew he was smiling.

“Virge, I thought all of you died in the fire! It was terrible, I couldn’t- I couldn’t stop thinking about you guys and how the fire was so hot and how I already missed you guys and how I was all alone an-”

“Patton!”

He looked at Virgil (wait, were his eyes shiny?).

“As much as I am a hypocrite for saying this, stop worrying. I’m the one with anxiety, not you.” Virgil softly smiled. “Okay. Thanks for stopping me, I started to spiral.” Patton smiled. “It seems I was on the  _ Virge _ of a breakdown.” Virgil groaned and let his head fall back onto the pillow while Patton smiled. 

“Ignoring that pun, the fact that you started to spiral is concerning. Are you okay?” he asked, looking at Patton with a concern. “Well, I thought my best friends just died in a fire and two minutes ago I found out they were alive, so as good as a guy can be after that,” Patton chuckled, smiling at the younger. “You sure?” “Yes, I’m definitely okay now that I know you guys are.” Patton gestured to the bandages. “Or at least, somewhat, okay.” He sighed, taking in his “son”'s face. It was so amazing that he was here and alive and okay.

But the others…

“Virgil, I do want to talk more as soon as we can, but can I…” Patton pointed his thumb towards the curtain next to them (that didn’t separate Virgil from Roman).

“Of course, Pat, I couldn’t hold you back from the others no matter how hard I tried.”

Patton smiled and ruffled Virgil’s hair, noticing how, for once, he didn’t swat away his hand, before heading around the next curtain.

In the section he went into next, was a certain nerd reading -you guessed it- a book. When Patton came into view, he looked up.

“Logan!”   
  


“Salutations, Patton.”

Logan slipped a bookmark into his book and set it on the table next to the bed as Patton walked over. Despite his not being fond of physical touch (well, actually, he loves it- he just won’t admit it), Patton hugged him. If Patton thought that he had gotten used to seeing people he thought were dead now alive, then he was wrong, because the tears started falling once more.

“Patton, may I inquire why you are crying?” Logan asked as Patton pulled away from the hug. “I just… I thought you had kicked the bucket- I thought  _ all  _ of you kicked the bucket!” Logan quirked an eyebrow. “What bucket? I don’t recall seeing a bucket in a long time, not to mention kicking one. Also, why would this make you unhappy?” Patton let out a breathy laugh- he’d missed Logan’s confusion with sayings. 

“No no no, kicking the bucket means dying. I thought you guys had  _ died,  _ Logan.” Logan’s mouth formed an “o”, then he nodded slowly. “I see, well I would console you, but I’m not experienced in that area, as you know. Therefore, I will tell you that though we may be injured, we are not dead. Oh and have you seen the others? I don’t know why, but Virgil did not want me to tell you that he very much wanted to see you and was constantly asking the doctors if you were here ye-”

“SHUT UP LOGAN, I CAN HEAR YOU!”

Ignoring Virgil’s outburst from the other side of the curtain and Patton’s smile, he went on. “Anyhow, I’m sure he would be happy to see you.” Patton chuckled, nodding. “No, I’ve already seen him and Roman.” Logan nodded. “Yes, I wasn’t sure. Usually when I’m reading I tune out any other noise, and when you came in I assumed it was some doctors coming to change Janus or Remus’ bandages, or give Virgil his anxiety medication.” Patton looked down. He hadn’t thought of the idea that Virgil would need more medication while he was here, at the hospital, and in a stressful situation. Then again, he didn’t think Virgil (or any of the others) was alive in the first place.

“Well, Patton, I appreciate that you came to visit, though I suspect that it was more to soothe your worries than have a chat, but I’m sure that was also your intention. Either way, I would like to get back to my book, I only have a few chapters left and I would like to finish it before I leave the hospital, which I suspect will be soon.” 

At this, Patton smiled. He knew Logan didn’t hate him or not enjoy his company, like anyone else who didn’t know him would think. So he got up and made his way to the bed next to Logan’s.

When he stepped into view, Patton was about to say hello to the patient when he was interrupted by a loud  _ CRUNCH! _

“REMUS! SPIT IT OUT NOW!” Patton yelled, running over to said man. He looked for a paper towel, napkin, anything, when he spotted a stack of plastic cups. Patton sprinted over, grabbed one, and went back and held it out to Remus, who was munching happily. “Spit what out?” he said, playing innocent. “THE GLASS!” Patton cried, shoving the cup towards his mouth. “Aw, but Patton, they’re so fun to chew. I wasn’t going to  _ swallow _ it, though that sounds intriguing now…” “Nuh-uh mister, cup now.”

Remus pouted for a moment, then, in the making it as gross as he could, spit a mix of saliva and crushed glass into the cup. “ _ All of it _ .” Remus smiled and spat even more into the cup; Patton knew him well enough that he knew that Remus would save some of it. Once it was all in the cup, Patton moved it away and held out his hand. Pouting, Remus pulled out the half-eaten lightbulb that he’d hidden under the sheets and set it into Patton’s hand, who proceeded to throw it away in a garbage can.

Once he got back, however, Patton couldn’t help but realize how he oddly missed Remus’ antics of doing strange things, and went in for a gentle hug. “C’mere,” he said as he did so. Remus did, alright, hugging  _ very _ tightly. “Remus, careful, you’ll hurt yourself if you hug that tight,” Patton sniffled out as the tears had already begun falling again. “Perfect, pain is arousing. I’m a bit of a masochist ya know,” he giggled evilly. “Oh my goodness,” the Dadly man choked out. “Patton, you okay? Did someone steal your dildo or somethin?” Remus asked, noticing Patton’s crying. “No, I just thought you had all died...” he responded quietly. 

“Oooh, we almost did!” Remus said excitedly as they broke the hug. “I did, anyway. It was funny, my shirt caught on fire when I had to move this blazing bookshelf. Look, this is the arm that got burnt!” he pointed to his right arm, currently wrapped in all bandages. “Apparently it’s really bad. Isn’t that exciting?!” Patton huffed. “Remus, I swear, you’re going to make me have a breakdown if you talk about how you almost died. I guess I can’t avoid it though, you guys are going to have to tell me the story of how you guys got out sooner or later.” The trash man grinned wickedly. “Oh my gosh, you’re gonna hate it. It’s so gruesome,” he exclaimed, eyes glinting. Patton shook his head as he wiped his eyes, making his glasses tilt at an odd angle. “I’m sure of it.”

Once he fixed his glasses, he crossed his arms and gave Remus the Dad Look ™.  “So how much trouble did you and Roman give to those poor doctors for getting everyone in the same room?” Remus’ mouth morphed into a pout. “Unfortunately, not much. Roman insisted that we do a-” Remus’ hands came up as he did air quotes, “‘valiant but peaceful protest’, or just refuse to go with them unless they put us in the same room. It was angeringly boring.” Patton smiled and sighed. “Good, I was worried someone had gotten hurt or even died.” The mustached man’s devilish smile appeared once again. “You know me too well, Patton. That would have been much more exciting.” 

Patton chuckled, then puffed out a sigh. “Well, it has been very nice chatting with you and making sure you didn’t sacrifice someone to the fire gods or something, but I need to go check on Janus and make sure he’s okay.” Remus pursed his lips, then smiled. “Okay, go check on the snakey dork.” Patton smiled and nodded, standing up. “Will do.” As he walked away, Remus called out, “Dork means whale penis! I was calling Janus a dick!” Patton gasped. “First of all, language,” he lectured (pointlessly), “and second, that isn’t very nice.” All Remus did was stick out his tongue as Patton turned around and headed to Janus’ section.

Unlike the other sections, which had been lit by a lamp sitting on a nightstand next to the bed (except for Remus, who had eaten the lamp lightbulb), Janus’ section was dark, save for the dim light of the ceiling lights peeking around the curtain. “Janus?” Patton asked quietly as he stepped in, looking at the lump that he assumed was his friend. As he walked over, he saw that it was, indeed, Janus, only he was sleeping. However, it was hard to tell, for his face was covered in mostly bandages and some scratches and burns. 

Patton let a few tears slip out as he ran a few light fingers across Janus’ forehead to brush his hair away from his face. He was so badly hurt that an entire half of his face was covered in bandages, and he couldn’t even see all the bandages under his hospital gown.  _ Poor Janus… _

After a moment of silence, Patton headed back to Quil and Joan. “So what are their injuries?” he asked, biting his lip. “Well,” Joan said, looking down at their clipboard. “Virgil has a broken ankle, we believe something crushed it or fell on it. Roman has some bad burns on his hands and shoulder, but other than that just minor injuries. Remus’ arm caught on fire and was burnt  _ very  _ badly. It got infected, but we’re trying some antibiotics to help with that. As for Janus, something fell on his face and burnt quite a good portion. Luckily his eye is okay, though it looks like a different color- a strange and rare phenomenon, but still good news that he was not blinded. And lastly, Logan is a bit burnt along his arms, feet, and hands.”

Patton bit his lip, holding tears in. He was upset that his roommates had such bad injuries- maybe if he’d gotten home a bit earlier, he could’ve seen part of the building on fire, then warned his friends…

But they were alive.

Oh my god, they were alive!

‘

“So… what happened?” he asked. “Well, from what I heard, they collected most of the survivors about twenty minutes after the fire started. Then, when they thought they’d gotten everyone, your friends stumbled out. I guess they tried to get them all into the ambulance, but the brothers wouldn’t let anyone touch them or anyone else unless they swore they would get into the same room. Once the first-responders did, they rushed them here and we fixed em’ up,” Joan said.

“Huh, yeah I definitely have to ask them more about it later,” Patton said, mostly to himself. Quil smiled and glanced over to the rows of curtains. “Well, now that you’ve seen them, do you want to go back to the station or stay here?” Patton looked at them with an eyebrow raised. “You think I would dare leave my best friends in the whole wide world after they almost died?” Quil then cracked a smile. “I didn’t think so,” they said, before putting their hands on their hips. “Well, I have to go, I have some paperwork to fill out,” Patton smiled and then took a step towards them, holding his arms open. “Can I hug you?” While Quil looked surprised at the offer, they quickly smiled and nodded, bringing their arms up too.

Once the hug was over, Patton said goodbye and soon Joan left too- they had other patients to tend to and he trusted Patton to not mess anything up. He was about to go back to one of his friends, when, for the millionth time that day, he started to cry. Patton walked over to a corner where he could only be seen by Janus, who was sleeping, and covered his mouth.

He couldn’t believe it.

His friends were alive!

He wasn’t alone.

\-----

“Ah, boo. Where’s all the juicy stuff?” Remus said, throwing popcorn at the TV. Roman rolled his eyes and got up to retrieve it. However, instead of walking back like the group expected, he threw the piece back at Remus, who gasped. “Oh, I’m going to shove this up your nostrils so far that a nosebleed will seem to hurt as bad as poking yourself with a pencil!” the uncensored man declared, jumping to his feet. Roman’s eyes shot wide open and he ran, circling the couch, with Remus chasing him not far behind.

When they came back around, Remus accidentally tripped on Janus’ outstretched leg. When he recovered, he glared at the smirking snakely man sitting on the floor, then grabbed a piece of popcorn from the bowl that sat where Roman used to be and held it up menacingly. At first he was confused, but soon realized what Remus was threatening to do and quickly covered his face with his hands. Then, on a second thought, Janus yanked an unsuspecting Logan from his seat on the couch and held him as a shield. 

“Janus, what are you doi-” suddenly, he was cut off by Remus grabbing another piece of popcorn and shoving both of them into Logan’s ears. “Wha- I- what?” Logan stuttered, looked from Janus to Remus, then narrowed his eyes, taking the popcorn out. “It would seem revenge is necessary. I will seek it by putting this popcorn in your mouth,” he decided, holding up the popcorn that had been in is ears. Remus squealed and shot to his feet, hiding behind the couch. Logan sighed, calmly walked over, and judging by the laughter, forced the popcorn into Remus’ mouth (who happily ate it). 

As this happened, Roman was watching with satisfaction, arms crossed. That was, until he felt something small hit the back of his head. He turned around to find a smug Virgil with the bowl of popcorn in his lap. Roman watched as he threw a piece of popcorn that hit him right in the face. The prince-like man gasped, then lunged for the bowl. Virgil protected it before getting up, grabbing a handful and pelting it at Roman. “How dare you!” he cried, picking up some of the fallen popcorn and throwing it back. Some of it missed, though, and instead hit Janus, who joined in the fight.

Soon, popcorn was flying everywhere as Patton looked on happily.

This was his family, and they were all right.

After Virgil, Logan, and Roman got out of the hospital, they explained what had happened. Apparently they had seen the fire and navigated down to one of the lower rooms. They were about to leave when an on-fire bookshelf fell in front of the door and onto Virgil’s foot, also spraying sparks onto Janus’ face and burning it. Roman and Remus hoisted the bookshelf back up- Remus ignoring the fact that  _ his arm was on fire _ \- and got out.

The hospital, though, was a different story. Logan, Roman, and Virgil were released a little bit after Patton visited. When it was told to them that Janus would have a scarred face for the rest of his life, they had told him their condolences and he assured them that he would be fine.

They were all horrified, however, to learn that the medicines didn’t work and they had to cut off Remus’ arm. Patton had cried and immediately rushed to Remus, saying that he was sorry, but Remus shushed him. “Pat, it's fine. Actually, it’s great! Imagine how many people I’ll be able to scare by taking off my bionic arm! Or maybe I could become a cyborg and have guns and knives hidden in the arm. Heck, at that point, it’ll be better than a regular arm!” So Remus had rambled on about how having his arm removed would be a great thing, somehow calming Patton.

Once Remus had gotten the surgery and was released from the hospital, they all looked for a new apartment. At the time, they had been staying at their family’s houses- or in Patton and Janus’ case, at a friend’s house- but now that they were all okay, they wanted to live together once again. After many appointments and internet-searching sessions, they had found a nice place close to a dog park, to Patton and Roman’s excitement. It even had a balcony! They had all agreed on it, packed up their things, and moved in.

So here they were.

Patton couldn’t have been happier, to be honest. Him and his friends were having a movie-night-turned-popcorn-war, and Patton wouldn’t have it any other way. Because this was them- these were his friends. They were here, they were alive.

Patton smiled, picked up a popcorn piece, and hurled it at Logan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand there ya have it. Was that what you were expecting? Tell me in the comments if you liked it!

**Author's Note:**

> OKAY OKAY OKAY  
> Before you kill me, I have a thing that I might want to do.  
> I kind of want to write another chapter, one that has a happy ending? I originally intended to leave you like this, but there's the real ending that I could write.  
> It's not like an alternate ending, it's just what actually happens after this one  
> Tell me if you guys want this or not in the comments.  
> But for now, I FED YOU, NOW SCRAM  
> <3


End file.
